If you have been through something that overwhelmed you completely, it is possible that a part of you is still trapped in that moment, even though the danger has already passed. Perhaps you are hit by images you never asked for, you sleep badly, you startle at any noise, or you avoid places and conversations that remind you of what happened. You may wonder why you cannot seem to move on, or you may even blame yourself for still feeling this way. We want to tell you something with all the clarity and warmth we can: what is happening to you has a name, it has an explanation and, above all, it has a treatment. Post-traumatic stress disorder is not weakness or a lack of willpower, but the response of a mind that tried to protect you from something that was simply too much. In this article we explain what it is, how it shows itself, what happens inside you when it appears and what paths there are to feel safe again.
\n\nWhat PTSD is and which experiences can cause it
\nPost-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a psychological response that can appear after living through or witnessing an event that threatened your life, your integrity or that of someone close to you. Faced with extreme danger, the body and mind react in order to survive; the problem arises when, once the event is over, that state of alarm does not switch off and remains active weeks or months later, invading your daily life.
\nMany experiences can leave this mark. Some of the most common are:
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- Serious traffic, workplace or domestic accidents. \n
- Physical or sexual assault, and situations of violence. \n
- Mistreatment, abuse or neglect, especially in childhood. \n
- The sudden or traumatic loss of a loved one. \n
- Serious medical diagnoses, procedures or births experienced with great fear. \n
- Natural disasters, fires or situations of war and displacement. \n
Not everyone who goes through something like this develops PTSD, and there is no trauma too small to count. What makes the difference is not the objective severity of the event, but how your nervous system experienced it and the resources you had at that moment.
\n\nThe four symptom groups
\nPTSD does not express itself the same way in everyone, but its manifestations tend to fall into four broad groups. Recognising them can help you bring order to something you may have experienced as a chaos that was hard to explain.
\nRe-experiencing. The memory of the trauma comes back again and again without you looking for it. Intrusive images, nightmares or so-called flashbacks appear, in which you feel you are reliving what happened as if it were occurring right now. Sometimes a smell, a sound or a date is enough to trigger an intense reaction of fear or distress.
\nAvoidance. Because those memories hurt, your mind tries to dodge them. You begin to avoid places, people, conversations or activities that remind you of them, and even your own thoughts and emotions. This avoidance brings relief in the short term, but little by little it closes you in and narrows your life.
\nChanges in mood and thinking. A very negative view of yourself, of others or of the world may appear (I cannot trust anyone, it was my fault), persistent feelings of fear, sadness, guilt or shame, difficulty feeling good things and a sense of disconnection from the people you love. It is also common not to remember important parts of what happened.
\nHyperarousal. Your body stays in a constant state of alert. You startle easily, you are always watching for danger, you find it hard to concentrate and sleep, and irritability or disproportionate reactions may appear. It is as if the internal alarm had been left switched on.
\n\nWhat happens in your brain and your body
\nUnderstanding what happens inside helps you stop blaming yourself. Faced with a threat, a small brain structure called the amygdala acts like a smoke detector: it sets off the alarm signal and prepares the body to fight, flee or freeze. Adrenaline and cortisol are released, the heart races, the muscles tense and attention narrows in order to react quickly. It is a brilliant, automatic mechanism that exists to save your life.
\nWhen the experience is too overwhelming, the brain cannot process and file that memory in the usual way. Instead of being stored as something that belongs to the past, it remains stored raw and unhealed, with all its sensations, images and emotions. That is why, when something reactivates it, you do not remember it: you relive it. The more rational part of the brain, which should tell you it is over, you are safe, loses strength against the alarm. It is not that you are exaggerating or doing it on purpose: it is your biology trying to protect you from a danger that is no longer there.
\n\nNormal stress reaction or PTSD
\nAfter a hard experience it is completely normal to feel bad. Crying, sleeping worse, being tense, having memories or wanting to avoid what happened are all part of the healthy way in which the mind digests a blow. In most cases, these symptoms gradually lose intensity as the weeks go by.
\nWe speak of PTSD when those reactions not only fail to ease but persist or worsen beyond roughly a month, and begin to clearly interfere with your life: with your rest, your work, your relationships or your ability to enjoy things. Some signs that it may be worth seeking help are:
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- The symptoms persist for weeks or months without improving. \n
- You avoid more and more things and your world becomes small. \n
- You feel you are not who you used to be and cannot connect with anyone. \n
- You turn to alcohol or other substances to get through it. \n
- Thoughts appear that it is not worth going on. \n
If you recognise yourself in several of these signs, you are not failing: you are needing help, just as a broken bone needs a trauma specialist.
\n\nComplex trauma
\nNot all trauma comes from a single event. When the harm is repeated and prolonged over time, especially in relationships that are hard to escape from (childhood mistreatment, intimate partner violence, ongoing abuse), we speak of complex trauma. Alongside the symptoms of PTSD, deeper difficulties tend to appear: trouble regulating emotions, a badly damaged image of oneself, a sense of emptiness or of being worthless, and great difficulties in relationships.
\nComplex trauma can feel like something that is part of your character, when in reality it is the mark of everything you had to endure. Healing is possible here too, although the process usually calls for a more careful, patient support that respects your own pace.
\n\nEvidence-based treatments
\nWe want you to hold on to this idea: PTSD is treatable. Research over recent decades has shown that trauma-focused psychotherapies help people process what they have lived through and recover their lives. It is not about forgetting, but about the memory no longer hurting as if it were the present and finally becoming, at last, the past.
\nAmong the best-supported approaches are:
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- EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing), a therapy that, through gentle bilateral stimulation, helps the brain reprocess traumatic memories and integrate them in a healthier way. At ER Psicología we work with EMDR precisely because of its effectiveness in working with trauma. \n
- Trauma-focused therapy, which includes adapted cognitive-behavioural approaches and carefully works with the memories, beliefs and emotions linked to what you have lived through. \n
- The prior work of stabilisation and regulation, learning tools to calm the body and feel safe before addressing the most difficult memories. \n
Each process is unique and is adapted to you, to your story and to your pace. It is never about stirring everything up at once, but about moving forward step by step, always within what you are able to hold.
\n\nWhat you can do in the meantime to care for yourself
\nAlthough the deep work is done in therapy, there are things you can start doing from today to help regulate your nervous system and treat yourself more kindly:
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- Breathe slowly and consciously when you notice anxiety rising; lengthening the exhalation tells your body that it can calm down. \n
- Use grounding tools to anchor yourself in the present: name five things you can see, feel your feet on the floor, touch an object and describe its texture. \n
- Take care of your rest, your food and gentle movement; walking or light exercise helps release accumulated tension. \n
- Reduce alcohol and other substances, which in the long run worsen sleep and anxiety. \n
- Lean on people you trust and allow yourself to ask for company, even if you do not want to tell them everything. \n
- Treat yourself with the same compassion you would give to someone you love: do not demand of yourself to go faster than you can. \n
These strategies do not replace therapy, but they can give you a little relief and a sense of control while you take the step of asking for help.
\n\nWhen and why to seek professional help
\nYou do not need to hit rock bottom to deserve help. If the distress drags on, if you avoid more and more things, if your life has become smaller or if you feel you cannot manage this on your own, asking for help is an act of courage and of care towards yourself. A trauma professional can support you in understanding what is happening to you, in feeling safer and in reprocessing what got trapped, so that it stops governing your present.
\nSeeking help does not mean reliving the pain over and over; quite the opposite: it means opening the door to gradually letting go of that weight, in a safe space and at your own pace. With the right support, a great many people who felt they would never be well again recover their calm, their sleep, their drive and their confidence.
\n\nIf you would like to go deeper, we recommend reading what EMDR is and getting to know our trauma and EMDR therapy.
\nIf something you have read here resonates with you, at ER Psicología we are here to support you. You can book a first consultation with no obligation with Emiliana Simionescu or Raquel Sánchez Ortiz, in person in Tres Cantos or Colmenar Viejo, or online too. It will be a safe, calm and unhurried space, where you can move forward at your own pace and feel that, at last, you do not have to carry this alone. There is still time to feel safe again.
